A whole new world!

Today was such a good day! I woke up and called the NICU to see how Darbi's night was and the nurse said that when she started her shift and went to check on Darbi, she was LOOKING BACK at her!!!! Her eyes opened! I was so extremely excited! We didn't think this would happen for at least a few more weeks. It was hard to get a good picture because she wouldn't keep them open for long and it was hit or miss. So instead I took some video of her stretching and trying to open her eyes. She is so dang cute!

Other good news: They did a brain scan this morning and the bleeding they found last week is going down! There is still some bleeding but they are expecting it to go down and flush itself out in the next few days! Tomorrow the surgeons will be putting some contrast dye down her esophogus to see if that hole has officially closed up and from there, they will decide if trying a feeding tube is an option one of these days. They've been doing a bunch of X-rays and there is no free air in her chest cavity which likely means the hole has closed up but the dye test is to just make sure.

Daddy's Ring

Today we boiled Clint's wedding ring in hot water before we left for the hospital so we could get a picture of Darbi wearing it. I love it because when she's older we'll be able to tell her that she was so small, she could wear Daddy's wedding ring on her thigh.

My idea of a baby's size and weight is skewed now because Darbi's neighbor at Primary is a sweet boy named Crew who weighs upwards of 3+ pounds and he looks like a full term baby. Darbi doesn't seem as small to me as she really is and this ring picture helps put her size into perspective.

They weighed her last night and she's at 530 grams. She's gained some weight but we're pretty sure it's just water. Give it time.

Darbi's visitors

Jed came to visit last weekend and I didn't get around to posting his picture with my bluish-white glowing radioactive baby. It's just the bili light. Don't fret. What a good looking uncle!!

Introducing... Darbi's GREAT-Grandma Linda! Darbi is her first great grandchild! What an honor.. Darbi is pretty excited about it too. She told me.

Bedroom Art

We asked our nieces if they would make a sign for us to put on Darbi's bedside. We love it!! Look at the bottom.. too cute!!

Happy 2 weeks Darbi!

Thursday was Darbi's 2 week birthday! I am going to take a picture of her every week to see the change and already, in just 2 weeks, she is looking SO good!

Here she is the day after she was born. Her skin was so thin and they needed to use heat packs to help keep her warm. They even had her in a ziploc bag because that ensures the heat stays trapped near her body.


And here she was yesterday evening. Her skin has a much better coloring and she doesn't need the bili light anymore. She's looks like a little baby doll!


So I may be really putting myself out there but here's a picture of me right before I went in for the C-section. Just remember... I was on magnesium and seeing double so my eyes are a little unfocused.


And here I am today! I'd like to think that while Darbi has come so far in the last 2 weeks.. I'm doing a little better myself. You know.. I'm wearing real clothes, not laying in a bed all day, and spending much of my time staring at my beautiful little girl!

Life is alright.. for now. :)

[EDITED]

Alison: You are SO right! How could I forget to post a picture of my beautiful husband?? Here he is. He has been my rock throughout all of this and I am so grateful for him! I love you Clint!!!

No news is GOOD news!

Sorry for not posting for the last few days. I guess that's a good thing though right? :) Nothing to report. Tuesday I went up to see Darbi with my sister-in-law Beth and the whole time we were up there she was really good for her nurse and slept the whole time. Beth told me that she could just stand there all day and stare at her. She doesn't do much but that's exactly how I feel. She's so beautiful and every little move she makes is a miracle and it's amazing to just watch her. I just sit next to her little bed and watch her move her little arms and wiggle around. She's just too cute! Yesterday, Clint and I went up and again, there was nothing really new going on. They had done another echo on her heart yesterday morning and it showed that the size of the PDA vein in her heart was small to moderately open. They said that it isn't affecting her heart or anything at the moment so they are going to leave it there until they can finish treating the infection in her lungs. We are hoping that when that infection is gone and they check the heart, the PDA will have finished closing. Then we won't have to do surgery on her heart.

So I had a followup appointment with Dr. Judd today to get my steri-strips (sp?) taken off of my incision and also for them to check my blood pressure. I was a little nervous going into that appointment because what if my BP was high again? Would they ship me right back to the hospital?? But thankfully, it was 130/80!! SO great!! They doctor said that even if it was a little high, he wouldn't send me back though because he knew I'd had enough. He decided to lower the amount of times I take my pills so essentially I'm taking less mg! He said I'm on the road to becoming a normal person again!

Now that I'm on my way to being a "normal person" I have to tell everyone.. I was way too excited. I've lost 30 pounds!!!!!!!!! I don't know what exactly my weight was right before I had Darbi but they weighed me about 2 days after. After all of the water weight and swelling went down, I officially weigh less than I did before I found out I was pregnant! A lot of that has to do with me not eating while I was in the hospital and also I lost a lot of muscle mass with not moving around but with everything that has been going on, I figure I can at least get excited about this! Talk about getting my New Years Resolutions taken care of fast! I'm only 3 weeks into the new year! This is sweet!

My mom is flying into town tonight and she will be bringing my Grandma Linda with her so she can finally see her! She's been a bit under the weather lately and we didn't want to risk her getting me sick or anyone who works near Darbi.

Darbi is 2 weeks old today! I'll be going up there later tonight and I'll be sure to get a good picture. I'm going to try and take one of her every Thursday so I can see how fast she is changing and growing (when she finally does start to put on weight).

Welcome to Holland

This little analogy was given to me by one of the nurses in the NICU. It really helps to put everything into perspective.

*********************

Welcome to Holland
By Emily Pert Kinsley

"When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

.....

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland."

Fast For Miss Darbi!

We made our second trip today to Primary Children's Medical Center today to see Miss Darbi. I can't tell you how much better she looks now. Her skin is starting to develop, and she is starting to get more active. Audrey even got to change Darbi's diaper today!

The doctors did another head ultrasound this morning which showed some bleeding on the brain. This is very common with children this age. On her right side, her bleeding is stage 2, and on the left, it's between stage 2 and 3. Bleeding on the brain can cause everything from mild physical disabilities to severe mental disorders. We are hopeful that her body will be able to flush out the fluid and her brain will continue to grow as normal, but we won't know for several more weeks what kind of impact this will have on her life. In the mean time, Audrey and I, along with my family and her family, have decided to fast again on Wednesday for Darbi. We would love to have anyone and everyone, who is able and willing, to participate.

Other than the bleeding, Darbi is doing very well. Her vitals are strong and she looks better than ever! Below is a picture of Audrey changing her diaper and also a picture of Audrey holding her hand. It gives you a good idea of how big Darbi really is!

Our first of many trips to Primary

Today, Clint and I drove up to Primary Children's to see Darbi. It was a little weird because Utah Valley has started to seem like our second home and now we have to get used to a completely new hospital with new staff and everything. When we got there it was "quiet time" in the NICU and so from 4-5pm, they turn off all of the lights and they don't do any tests or anything on the babies. You also have to whisper when you are near them and that is to ensure that the babies get at least one good hour of uninterrupted sleep with essentially no stimulation whatsoever. It was kind of relaxing, even for Clint and I.

They had done a few more X-rays on her since yesterday and they also did one while we were there and we were able to see that there was no air escaping from her esophagus into her chest cavity like the doctors were anticipating. Still great news! We're definitely not in the clear yet because they did a lung culture on her and we are awaiting the results to see if she really does have pneumonia or some kind of bacteria in there. I'm not sure of the details on that test but whatever the results, I know we can get through it and I know Darbi will be strong.

When we called up there this morning to see how she is doing, the nurse said that we had one "feisty" little girl. I was so proud! I mean, I don't want her expending unnecessary energy but if they do something to her and it makes her uncomfortable, she will let them know it! That means that she won't succumb to anything that is attacking her body like an infection or something. She won't give up and she'll fight as hard as she can to be here. I know that our Heavenly Father wouldn't have sent her to us early if he knew that she couldn't handle the trials she would face here. She's a strong little girl and she amazes me everyday with her progress. I know there will be set backs but I'm sure the Lord will help her and help Clint and I to get through it.

I just want everyone to know how grateful we are for all of the thoughts and prayers that have been made on our behalf. I know we wouldn't be where we are right now without the faith of all of you out there. I'll bake cookies for you all someday! I promise! :)

And Now The Good News...

2 pieces of GOOD news to report!

Audrey is FINALLY being discharged. We should be home within an hour or so - yay! Our doctor said that if they didn't let her go home for some reason though, that we should sneak out the back door. He's a funny guy...

Darbi made it safely to Primary Childrens this morning. The nurse called me just an hour or so ago to let us know that they can't find any air inside her chest cavity, which likely indicates that the hole in her esophagus is closing on its own already! This is wonderful news! They are going to be taking X-Rays of her every 6 hours to make sure that it continues to progress.

We'll keep you all posted though!

Darbi's First Road Trip

We got a call this morning from Dr. Ogden about Darbi. In the course of putting a feeding tube into her stomach, her esophagus was punctured. They say that it is very serious. They just bundled her up and transported her to Primary Children's Hospital. They aren't necessarily going to do surgery, but they want her up there just in case she needs emergency surgery. Primary Children's is the only place in the state that has the surgeons needed for this type of case, but as long as Darbi can avoid infection, her body should repair the puncture on it's own. She will be up there for at least a few weeks until this puncture is repaired, her PDA is taken care of, and she is stable. At that point, they will transport her back down to UVRMC. Jon Standing, my elders quorum president, came down to help me give Darbi a blessing just before the move. Thanks Jon! We are praying harder than ever for Darbi.

Audrey continues to stay in the hospital with blood pressure problems. It has come down a lot though from where it was. We are hoping that she will get released today.

The doctors will be calling us later today to give us an update on Darbi from Primary Childrens.

This is a picture of Darbi all bundled up during transport.

Yesterday's excitement

Sorry for the lag on the posting.. I totally was going to post last night then we had some complications on mommy's part (that would be me.. the mommy). Darbi is doing great by the way.. So to recap yesterday, Clint left for school around 7:30 in the morning and I basically just hung out in my room until he got home. My doctor came in and told me that we're still looking for the correct "recipe" of medication that will take my blood pressure down and I probably WON'T be going home yet. BUMMER. Oh well I said.. I'm close to Darbi and out of the snow.

So around 4:00 Clint, the nurse, and I decided it was time for my shower (it had only been 2 days.. c'mon..). That took about an hour because they had to tape up the 2 IV's I had.. yes. 2!! Why 2?? They alternate which one the medicine goes in so the other one doesn't get jealous.. ridiculous... Anyway, one is on my left elbow which meant that arm would not bend and the other is on my right wrist which meant that elbow would bend but not the wrist. It was pretty funny while I tried to shave my legs and wash my hair with much help from Clint. I'm glad I can be positive about this... but really. It was FUNNY.

So.. after my shower, we went up to see Darbi before the shift change and her nurse said that she hadn't had to adjust her levels at all which was a really good sign and she was just sleeping, hopefully dreaming happy dreams. So we went back to my room and waited for Jed to come. He was driving up to go snowboarding with some of his friends and was going to stop by to see his new niece.

Anyway.. around 6:00 my nurse comes in and tells me they want to move me to ICU. ICU???? Isn't that where all the comatose or dying patients are?? I am NEITHER I told them. Then she said they were going to have to put an arterial IV in and it would probably go IN MY NECK!!!! Needless to say, my blood pressure sky rocketed. The nurse felt so bad that she was making this worse for me. So then the HEAD of the entire ICU came in to talk to me.. apparently I'm important enough that I caught his eye. He settled my fears and said they would do the arterial line in my wrist. Not bad. I can handle that. So we get down to ICU and they put me in this room that is huge and has all the bells and whistles like in the movies when someone is dying, and they have me get on the bed. Let me tell you... ICU patients have it so nice... my bed fills up with air every 15 minutes! I'm sleeping on a fluffy cloud and it was the best night sleep I've gotten so far!

So anyway, the girl comes in to do my arterial line and apparently it's an entire surgical procedure where she has to "gown up" and become sterile and everything. She ended up NOT finding it and poked my artery 5 different times and they brought ANOTHER guy in to try and he poked that same side a few more times along with the other side 2 more times! I'm sick of getting POKED! So, while all this poking is going on, my BP was only 156/89!!! I needed a stressful situation to scare my blood pressure away! Apparently having a baby at 24 weeks isn't stressful enough. Whatever. Since they couldn't get into my artery (I guess it's crooked or something..) they decided NOT to put an arterial IV in so I have a BP cuff that goes off every 15 minutes. All that stress for nothing!

So. Now. I'm in ICU with a blood pressure of around 130/70 and they will probably move me up to another floor tonight and hopefully discharge me tomorrow. All these false discharge claims are starting to wear on me..

I'll post a Darbi update later today. I called up there and her blood sugars were a little low today so she's getting more blood and the doctor will do another echo on her heart today to make sure everything looks good. So.. maybe I'll be posting from a new room.. hopefully my OWN.. at my house!