No news is GOOD news!

Sorry for not posting for the last few days. I guess that's a good thing though right? :) Nothing to report. Tuesday I went up to see Darbi with my sister-in-law Beth and the whole time we were up there she was really good for her nurse and slept the whole time. Beth told me that she could just stand there all day and stare at her. She doesn't do much but that's exactly how I feel. She's so beautiful and every little move she makes is a miracle and it's amazing to just watch her. I just sit next to her little bed and watch her move her little arms and wiggle around. She's just too cute! Yesterday, Clint and I went up and again, there was nothing really new going on. They had done another echo on her heart yesterday morning and it showed that the size of the PDA vein in her heart was small to moderately open. They said that it isn't affecting her heart or anything at the moment so they are going to leave it there until they can finish treating the infection in her lungs. We are hoping that when that infection is gone and they check the heart, the PDA will have finished closing. Then we won't have to do surgery on her heart.

So I had a followup appointment with Dr. Judd today to get my steri-strips (sp?) taken off of my incision and also for them to check my blood pressure. I was a little nervous going into that appointment because what if my BP was high again? Would they ship me right back to the hospital?? But thankfully, it was 130/80!! SO great!! They doctor said that even if it was a little high, he wouldn't send me back though because he knew I'd had enough. He decided to lower the amount of times I take my pills so essentially I'm taking less mg! He said I'm on the road to becoming a normal person again!

Now that I'm on my way to being a "normal person" I have to tell everyone.. I was way too excited. I've lost 30 pounds!!!!!!!!! I don't know what exactly my weight was right before I had Darbi but they weighed me about 2 days after. After all of the water weight and swelling went down, I officially weigh less than I did before I found out I was pregnant! A lot of that has to do with me not eating while I was in the hospital and also I lost a lot of muscle mass with not moving around but with everything that has been going on, I figure I can at least get excited about this! Talk about getting my New Years Resolutions taken care of fast! I'm only 3 weeks into the new year! This is sweet!

My mom is flying into town tonight and she will be bringing my Grandma Linda with her so she can finally see her! She's been a bit under the weather lately and we didn't want to risk her getting me sick or anyone who works near Darbi.

Darbi is 2 weeks old today! I'll be going up there later tonight and I'll be sure to get a good picture. I'm going to try and take one of her every Thursday so I can see how fast she is changing and growing (when she finally does start to put on weight).

Welcome to Holland

This little analogy was given to me by one of the nurses in the NICU. It really helps to put everything into perspective.

*********************

Welcome to Holland
By Emily Pert Kinsley

"When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

.....

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland."

Fast For Miss Darbi!

We made our second trip today to Primary Children's Medical Center today to see Miss Darbi. I can't tell you how much better she looks now. Her skin is starting to develop, and she is starting to get more active. Audrey even got to change Darbi's diaper today!

The doctors did another head ultrasound this morning which showed some bleeding on the brain. This is very common with children this age. On her right side, her bleeding is stage 2, and on the left, it's between stage 2 and 3. Bleeding on the brain can cause everything from mild physical disabilities to severe mental disorders. We are hopeful that her body will be able to flush out the fluid and her brain will continue to grow as normal, but we won't know for several more weeks what kind of impact this will have on her life. In the mean time, Audrey and I, along with my family and her family, have decided to fast again on Wednesday for Darbi. We would love to have anyone and everyone, who is able and willing, to participate.

Other than the bleeding, Darbi is doing very well. Her vitals are strong and she looks better than ever! Below is a picture of Audrey changing her diaper and also a picture of Audrey holding her hand. It gives you a good idea of how big Darbi really is!

Our first of many trips to Primary

Today, Clint and I drove up to Primary Children's to see Darbi. It was a little weird because Utah Valley has started to seem like our second home and now we have to get used to a completely new hospital with new staff and everything. When we got there it was "quiet time" in the NICU and so from 4-5pm, they turn off all of the lights and they don't do any tests or anything on the babies. You also have to whisper when you are near them and that is to ensure that the babies get at least one good hour of uninterrupted sleep with essentially no stimulation whatsoever. It was kind of relaxing, even for Clint and I.

They had done a few more X-rays on her since yesterday and they also did one while we were there and we were able to see that there was no air escaping from her esophagus into her chest cavity like the doctors were anticipating. Still great news! We're definitely not in the clear yet because they did a lung culture on her and we are awaiting the results to see if she really does have pneumonia or some kind of bacteria in there. I'm not sure of the details on that test but whatever the results, I know we can get through it and I know Darbi will be strong.

When we called up there this morning to see how she is doing, the nurse said that we had one "feisty" little girl. I was so proud! I mean, I don't want her expending unnecessary energy but if they do something to her and it makes her uncomfortable, she will let them know it! That means that she won't succumb to anything that is attacking her body like an infection or something. She won't give up and she'll fight as hard as she can to be here. I know that our Heavenly Father wouldn't have sent her to us early if he knew that she couldn't handle the trials she would face here. She's a strong little girl and she amazes me everyday with her progress. I know there will be set backs but I'm sure the Lord will help her and help Clint and I to get through it.

I just want everyone to know how grateful we are for all of the thoughts and prayers that have been made on our behalf. I know we wouldn't be where we are right now without the faith of all of you out there. I'll bake cookies for you all someday! I promise! :)

And Now The Good News...

2 pieces of GOOD news to report!

Audrey is FINALLY being discharged. We should be home within an hour or so - yay! Our doctor said that if they didn't let her go home for some reason though, that we should sneak out the back door. He's a funny guy...

Darbi made it safely to Primary Childrens this morning. The nurse called me just an hour or so ago to let us know that they can't find any air inside her chest cavity, which likely indicates that the hole in her esophagus is closing on its own already! This is wonderful news! They are going to be taking X-Rays of her every 6 hours to make sure that it continues to progress.

We'll keep you all posted though!

Darbi's First Road Trip

We got a call this morning from Dr. Ogden about Darbi. In the course of putting a feeding tube into her stomach, her esophagus was punctured. They say that it is very serious. They just bundled her up and transported her to Primary Children's Hospital. They aren't necessarily going to do surgery, but they want her up there just in case she needs emergency surgery. Primary Children's is the only place in the state that has the surgeons needed for this type of case, but as long as Darbi can avoid infection, her body should repair the puncture on it's own. She will be up there for at least a few weeks until this puncture is repaired, her PDA is taken care of, and she is stable. At that point, they will transport her back down to UVRMC. Jon Standing, my elders quorum president, came down to help me give Darbi a blessing just before the move. Thanks Jon! We are praying harder than ever for Darbi.

Audrey continues to stay in the hospital with blood pressure problems. It has come down a lot though from where it was. We are hoping that she will get released today.

The doctors will be calling us later today to give us an update on Darbi from Primary Childrens.

This is a picture of Darbi all bundled up during transport.

Yesterday's excitement

Sorry for the lag on the posting.. I totally was going to post last night then we had some complications on mommy's part (that would be me.. the mommy). Darbi is doing great by the way.. So to recap yesterday, Clint left for school around 7:30 in the morning and I basically just hung out in my room until he got home. My doctor came in and told me that we're still looking for the correct "recipe" of medication that will take my blood pressure down and I probably WON'T be going home yet. BUMMER. Oh well I said.. I'm close to Darbi and out of the snow.

So around 4:00 Clint, the nurse, and I decided it was time for my shower (it had only been 2 days.. c'mon..). That took about an hour because they had to tape up the 2 IV's I had.. yes. 2!! Why 2?? They alternate which one the medicine goes in so the other one doesn't get jealous.. ridiculous... Anyway, one is on my left elbow which meant that arm would not bend and the other is on my right wrist which meant that elbow would bend but not the wrist. It was pretty funny while I tried to shave my legs and wash my hair with much help from Clint. I'm glad I can be positive about this... but really. It was FUNNY.

So.. after my shower, we went up to see Darbi before the shift change and her nurse said that she hadn't had to adjust her levels at all which was a really good sign and she was just sleeping, hopefully dreaming happy dreams. So we went back to my room and waited for Jed to come. He was driving up to go snowboarding with some of his friends and was going to stop by to see his new niece.

Anyway.. around 6:00 my nurse comes in and tells me they want to move me to ICU. ICU???? Isn't that where all the comatose or dying patients are?? I am NEITHER I told them. Then she said they were going to have to put an arterial IV in and it would probably go IN MY NECK!!!! Needless to say, my blood pressure sky rocketed. The nurse felt so bad that she was making this worse for me. So then the HEAD of the entire ICU came in to talk to me.. apparently I'm important enough that I caught his eye. He settled my fears and said they would do the arterial line in my wrist. Not bad. I can handle that. So we get down to ICU and they put me in this room that is huge and has all the bells and whistles like in the movies when someone is dying, and they have me get on the bed. Let me tell you... ICU patients have it so nice... my bed fills up with air every 15 minutes! I'm sleeping on a fluffy cloud and it was the best night sleep I've gotten so far!

So anyway, the girl comes in to do my arterial line and apparently it's an entire surgical procedure where she has to "gown up" and become sterile and everything. She ended up NOT finding it and poked my artery 5 different times and they brought ANOTHER guy in to try and he poked that same side a few more times along with the other side 2 more times! I'm sick of getting POKED! So, while all this poking is going on, my BP was only 156/89!!! I needed a stressful situation to scare my blood pressure away! Apparently having a baby at 24 weeks isn't stressful enough. Whatever. Since they couldn't get into my artery (I guess it's crooked or something..) they decided NOT to put an arterial IV in so I have a BP cuff that goes off every 15 minutes. All that stress for nothing!

So. Now. I'm in ICU with a blood pressure of around 130/70 and they will probably move me up to another floor tonight and hopefully discharge me tomorrow. All these false discharge claims are starting to wear on me..

I'll post a Darbi update later today. I called up there and her blood sugars were a little low today so she's getting more blood and the doctor will do another echo on her heart today to make sure everything looks good. So.. maybe I'll be posting from a new room.. hopefully my OWN.. at my house!

My shy girl...

Darbi got to meet her Great-Grandparents today! She was a little shy but she'll open up to them eventually. I just know it! She's gonna love them! They stopped by for a quick visit on their way through town and I'm so glad!

The doctor updated me real quick while we were up there and the reason her little plastic box is so foggy is because they are keeping the humidity in there at 70% because she's not responding well to temperature changes in the air around her. She's had a little bit of skin breakdown but it's not too bad and they've got some special ointment on her to help it heal. They also did a brain scan on her today and her brain is looking good with no bleeding!

I'm still in the hospital. My BP is still all over the place and they are going to do a kidney ultrasound on me today just to double check everything. I think my kidneys are fine because I have to go at least every hour there's plenty to go around. But we'll see how the next few days go.

Newborns come with palm pilots?!

When the doctors told us that they were going to give Darbi medication to attempt to close her PDA, the first thing I thought was... "Newborns come with Palm Pilots?!" Then I realized that I was probably wrong. They must be talking about Public Displays of Affection. But no... It actually stands for Patent Ductus Arteriosus (you guessed it... latin). If you want a pronunciation key, Google it - I can't pronounce it.

The PDA is a small blood vessel used in the transport of oxygen in the womb. This needs to be closed in order for Darbi to be able to use her lungs properly. There are two ways of treating this.

1 - Surgery!
2 - Medication! (our favorite)

The medication has a 50% chance to successfully close it without surgery, but it takes ~3 days. The doctors gave Darbi a dose of the medication on Saturday and did the echo today to see if it closed. Fortunately it closed! This is great news because now that her PDA is taken care of, she is off of her BP medication, and she is no longer taking doses of insulin they can start making attempts to give her REAL food.

While we have many more milestones to achieve, this is a very important one for her. As long as we can keep her out of surgery, the stronger she can get!

Still here...

So I'm STILL in the hospital. I'm so sick of this place. UGH. The plan was to go home yesterday... and then today... and now we're scheduled to leave TOMORROW. I've gone the rounds with all the nurses and I'm back to where I started. I've probably had them all at least twice! The reason I'm still here- my blood pressure is still out of control. I can't seem to get out of the the 170 range. The doctors changed my medication today though and hopefully it will work. They just checked me and I was at 158/100. That bottom number is the worrisome one though. Hopefully this works. The nice thing about being here though is we can go up and see Darbi anytime we want and we don't have to worry about driving in the awful weather! Have you SEEN the snow??? I can't believe it.

Anyway, we got a call from the NICU doctor this morning and Darbi is doing really well! Everything came back normal with her blood test results today and tomorrow she is scheduled to have another brain ultrasound to make sure there is still no bleeding up there. If it comes back clean tomorrow, I think she's pretty much out of the woods on her brain developing alright. At least that's what we're praying for. They've taken her off of her blood pressure medicine (makes one of us.. at least her BP is cooperating..) and also off of the insulin for her blood sugar.

They turned her on her tummy the other day and she looked so cozy sleeping like that. I can't wait until we can actually hold her. That won't be for a few months though.. We're planning on her being here at least until her due date which was April 25th.

We're heading up to see her right now so if there's more to report.. I'll post it later today.

On a side note.. I'm getting sick of hospital food.. Check out this piece of artwork.. "Windowpane Gelatin" GROSS.

Darbi Update

It's Audrey this time.. Just wanted to let everyone know I'm feeling better. My blood pressure has finally started to drop and I thought I'd post some pictures for everyone to see. We went up to see Darbi last night and the Doctor said she is doing really well for being only 23 weeks. So far her stay in the NICU has been "uneventful" which is really good and definitely what we want to hear. The nurses will start to feed her my milk in the next few days which is going to be really

crucial in her growth over the next few months. It's nice to know that I am important and can do something to help my daughter through this even if I can barely touch her.

Little Darbi Came Early!

This is going to be short, but on January 1st, 2009 our OB/GYN decided that the pre-eclampsia that Audrey was experiencing was no longer controllable and decided to perform a C-section. The good news is that we had 72 hours to prep for it with steroids and various other medications to help Darbi after the birth. Darbi was born at 12:44 PM and was immediately rushed to the NICU. She is doing really well and is responding to treatment incredibly well. When she was born, she weighed 444 grams, 1 gram shy of a pound which is pretty much what the doctors told us she would weigh.

Audrey is doing very well now that she is off of the magnesium drip (to avoid siezures). She is up and walking about now and is able to eat solid foods now.

We will post more, but our family needs some time to recuperate. Please keep praying for Darbi though. She has a long way to go...

Here's a picture to hold you over :)